The Top Five Fast-Food Chicken Sandwiches of All Time

1. Zaxby's Chicken Tender Club

Perfection.  I don't really know where to start the accolades: the perfect crispiness of the tenders, the buttery texas toast, and that sweet sweet Zax sauce.  Oh yea, there's bacon on it too.

2. Bojangle's Southern Filet Biscuit

For me Bojangles was definitely "gateway chicken".  I'd always enjoyed fried chicken before, but after Bojangles it began to teeter more into the realm of obsession.

3. Chick-fil-A's Classic Chicken Sandwich

The beauty of this sandwich lays in its simplicity.  Could be further up the list if it was possible to enjoy on Sunday, the official day of fried chicken.  On a side-note; is it just me or is there something oddly mesmerizing about that bun?

4. Arby's Chicken, Bacon, & Swiss

This is the real sleeper on the list.  Most people don't think chicken when they're thinking Arby's, but this sandwich is a real winner.  Pairs particularly well with curly fries.

5. Wendy's Spicy Chicken Sandwich

The first fast food chicken sandwich that I bypassed a burger for. However, I have to say that I preferred it with the classic Wendy's plain bun over the new standard kaiser rolls.  Unfortunately Wendy's has really fallen off over the last couple of years.  They've been in a prolonged slump ever since Dave went to the big salad bar in the sky.  

* Honorable Mention: Wendy's Monterey Chicken Ranch

Go here http://bringbackthewendyschickensandwich.com/sign/sign.aspx to sign the petition to bring back this wonderful sandwich.

Captain's Blog Technological Innovations: Part I

Me and some of the eggheads from down in the IT Department have been busy at work trying to figure out a way to drive more traffic to the blog. We've come to the conclusion that focusing on high-tech innovations for the site seems the logical course of action. Ed, our youth culture consultant, suggested that we start a Twitter feed or create some sort of neat Facebook app. I immediately round house kicked Ed in the groin, and that's when a little red light-bulb went on over my head:

"The Road House Red Alert"

The way that it works is basically this: Anytime that Patrick Swayze's "Road House" is being broadcast on TBS, an emergency red light in the corner of the page will be activated. Thus alerting viewers to stop what they are doing and tune into Swayze's magnum opus.

By this point Ed had gathered his breath and suggested that this actually encourages people to stop reading the blog and instead turn on their tv's. He also put forth the consideration that because "Road House" was constantly being shown on TBS, that Captain's Blog would be continuously interrupted...thus earning Ed the dreaded spinning round house kick to the testicles / trachea karate-chop combo.

Then I very cooly said, "Ed...more like, Dead". The Swayze would've been proud.

Road House (Theatrical Trailer)

*Stay tuned for more exciting technological innovations*

Dear Santa...

And now for something completely different...

Today we'll stray from discussing my gastronomical exploits and shoot for something slightly more high-minded. There's a new documentary in theaters that I'm looking forward to checking out, it's called "Anvil". It follows the exploits of a washed up Canadian heavy-metal band that is still kicking it even though fame passed them up over 2 decades ago. So in honor of Anvil I present you with my favorite documentaries of all time:

1. American Movie

2. Trekkies

3. The King of Kong (A Fistful of Quarters)

4. Spellbound

5. Darkon

The Double Bypass Burger

• Six slices of bacon
• Two fried eggs
• A grilled cheese sandwich for each bun

I feel like I just got shot with a tranquilizing meat dart*

*that's what she said

A Miracle of Modern Design

It's a truly beautiful thing when form and function combine.   For years hard tacos have been losing the taco wars to soft tacos.  Primarily for two reasons:

1. You can't stuff enough meat inside*
2. After you've constructed the perfect taco it tips over and spills
   

The Stand N' Stuff taco shell solves both of these problems while still maintaing the hard shells strongest strategical advantage over the soft shell: the ability to quickly convert from taco to taco salad.

*that's what she said

Biscuitville

The best thing to happen to hangovers since sweatpants.

What To Expect From Captains Blog

• Fat twins on motorcycles
• Bullet points

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